Healthier Scotland. Scottish Government

Turn ons

Easy, sexy talk

There are some things about sex that we all need to talk about. With new partners, everyone should talk about protection, regular partners might want to change the protection they use. We might want to talk about getting tested, or discuss a sexual health problem with our partners.

Being able to talk honestly and sensibly about these things is much easier if partners can talk to each other about sex without feeling strange or embarrassed.

The good news is that if you start by talking about what you like and what you can do to turn each other on, talking about sex can become a whole lot of fun.

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Explore

Sex can become boring if partners only ever do the same things in the same ways. Talking about new or different things we'd like to try before we try them is a good idea. That way, partners can be reassured about what will happen during sex and look forward to it with fresh enthusiasm.

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More of what everyone wants

When it comes to sex, everybody is different and people respond in different ways to different things.

It could take you years of trial and error to figure out what your partner likes. Exploring each other is part of the fun but you could save a lot of time by also asking them what they like.

Once they've let you know about something that turns them on, you can tell them what you like. Try and stick to just one or two things at a time though – otherwise it could all get a bit daunting.

Changing desires

The things that turn people on often change over time. To keep up good communication and to continue learning more about each other, keep talking about what turns you on.

Talking about what you like – and what you don't – helps relationships stay fresh in the long term.

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